Geraldine Mary Foley

Born 9 November 1936, entered eternal life on 29 March 2024

Geraldine always believed herself extremely fortunate, that she was always in the right place at the right time… and she would say that her favourite memories and experiences were gifted to her by three things: People, Books and Places.

We look at Geraldine through the lens of these cherished gifts, People, Books, Places

People

Geraldine was born in Adelaide in 1936, to John and Kathleen O’Connell, joining older brother Brian.

Born between two world wars and during the Great Depression, life was filled with sacrifices, and they struggled.  But her parents ensured she and her brother received a good education.  This, Geraldine believed, was her ticket, it enabled her a rich career and the life she loved.

In her early years in Adelaide, Geraldine was surrounded by her many aunts and uncles and cousins, seeing and experiencing their adventures and stories firsthand.  This environment sowed the seeds of independence, sense of adventure and possibility.  It’s also where she discovered tennis!  More on this later.

These early years also established her sense of frugality.  When growing up, turning the heater on was not an option on cold winters days, just put another jumper on.

Books

Geraldine grew up in a house full of books; 1920’s novels, biographies, history and law books.  So when she left school, it made sense she’d ignore the traditional nursing and teaching route, to seek employment at the Public Library in Adelaide while studying for her Arts Degree.

Geraldine loved it.  This first job was a great stepping stone to a role at Australian National University as research assistant on a massive project, The Handbook of Australian Government and Politics.  Basically, Geraldine was charged with researching and recording every State and Federal election results since 1890, some published some unpublished, across Australia.  Now, it’s not like she could Google ‘election results, by year’ and we are not sure how relevant the microfiche technology was then.  It was big, complex and challenging.  And she was in her happy place.  This job earned her much recognition.  And the skills she developed helped her secure many future roles, like Researcher with the Department of Government at the University of Sydney and Career & Employment Services role at RMIT. 

It also explains the cataloguing system our bookshelves had at home.  So many books, so well ordered and catalogued.  In fact, the photos in our albums were the same.  Meticulous.

Geraldine was a voracious reader, and enjoyed her Book Clubs, she usually had two on the go at a time.  She loved reading other people’s suggestions, the variety of thought and the discussions that followed.  I think she also loved the excuse to catch up with her friends over a chicken sandwich and slice of carrot cake.

Places

Geraldine loved to travel.  She was pretty keen to get out of Adelaide, she’d read and heard too much about the rest of the world. 

And so she did.  Through her adventures, Geraldine saw cities and countries develop, change, rename, rise, fall, rebuild.  She travelled most of the world, several times, first as a young adult, then through the eyes of a married woman, a mother and free retiree.  She was always happiest travelling or planning a trip, and talking travel was a favourite conversation.  I think, one of the moments she was proudest was when her daughter Susan booked her first trip overseas.  The reaction to the news Susan was pregnant with her first child was not quite as excited as the reaction to ‘I’ve booked for New York’!

There are four places that really got to Geraldine – London, Canberra, Bangkok and Melbourne.

• London

It was 1960 and Geraldine had been saving up for her Boomerang Fare.  Princess Margaret was getting married, and London was abuzz.  Staying in Earls Courts, working at Hatchard’s Book Shop (again, securing the job thanks to her public library experience), catching over 50 West End productions (sitting ‘in the Gods’).  She used London as a launch pad to the rest of Europe, touring through the north and south of Europe twice.

Talking to their mother about those days it sounds like it was an awakening for Geraldine, the realisation of hopes and setting of new dreams at a time when anything was possible.

• Canberra

Geraldine set up in Canberra when she returned from London.  It was her idea of heaven.  It was young, and undergoing massive growth, big (compared to Adelaide), and so interesting.  Geraldine described it as a community of ready-made friends, many expats like her.  And her career and social life flourished. 

It’s in Canberra she met two loves – John Foley and skiing (but we dared never ask her to rank them).  In fact, Geraldine and John were introduced by mutual friends on a ski trip, and their love affair for each other and the snow continued until John’s passing over 40 years later.  Although, John almost missed his chance.  John was in the RAAF and a keen rower, and his weekends were filled with regattas and work.  He couldn’t secure a day for their wedding.  So, Geraldine let him know that was fine, if he didn’t have time to marry then she’d head to Finland.  It wasn’t an idle threat, she was really keen to see Finland and had placed a deposit on the fare.  Needless to say, they were married a couple of weeks later, on Remembrance Day in 1967. 

Geraldine and John shared a lot of interests, like travel and sport, and were really involved in their community, their family and faith.  They were a great model for a loving, supportive and respectful relationship, of equals.  Soon after marrying, they moved to the Blue Mountains and almost a year later Matthew was born.

Geraldine and John were posted back to Canberra a couple of times where Georgina and Kate, were born.

• Bangkok

In 1971, John was posted to South East Asia Treat Organisation (SEATO), so off they went to Bangkok. 

Geraldine loved this!  Living in a house on the banks of a klong, getting around the city by waving down a passing long boat, or starting up her own. 

She had some help around the home, so this freed her up to explore the country (including a wild bus ride into Chang Mai when 6 months pregnant) and to get really involved in the expat scene, starting up the British Australian Bridge Club, tennis tournaments etc.  But getting to know local Thai families beyond SEATO, really enriched her time there. 

It’s in Thailand, that Susan was born, and Mat and George flourished.

Geraldine talked about one lesson she learnt in Thailand and was never forgotten; the only people she saw on the streets of Bangkok that looked unhappy were the foreigners.  The Thais, who had little by comparison, were always smiling and looking happy. 

This is something Geraldine tried to live by too.

• Melbourne

After Bangkok, the family returned to Canberra staying long enough for daughter Kate to be born, then they moved to Melbourne permanently.  By now, Geraldine had also taken a career break to raise their four kids.

Melbourne was new for Geraldine, she’d never lived here but she and John did an amazing job creating a great home and life for the family, in a welcoming parish with fantastic schools (and even more fantastic tennis clubs) that enabled wonderful experiences and memories for us all. 

In Melbourne, Geraldine got involved in the schools the children attended and the local church – she could often be found at Sunday Mass reading.  She joined book clubs, played bridge (very seriously), got involved in the community, and continued her love of performance by attending theatre, opera (this time, not sitting ‘in the Gods’).  In recent years, she really enjoyed watching her grandchildren perform, in school plays, piano recitals, choirs and more.

And of course, Geraldine became a keen participant at several local tennis clubs.  Playing competitively, winning several pennants alongside women who would become very special friends.

When the children were all in school, Geraldine went back to university and completed a Graduate Diploma in Careers Education.  This led to her second career, working as a careers counsellor at schools and universities. 

Settling in Melbourne didn’t stop Geraldine travelling.  There were plenty of local holidays, and the annual week with just her and John in Perisher.  However, once the children were in high school, they started travelling the world again.  Usually to a ski destination for a couple of weeks then a couple more weeks elsewhere.  They skied most of the USA and Canada.  Geraldine was able to spend lots of time with her brother Brian and his family in Toronto. 

After John’s passing, Geraldine resumed her love of cruises (think back to the 1960’s cruise to London) and saw a lot of the world, a lot.  She loved her cruises – the destinations, the people she’d meet and the bridge games!  It felt like she was always either on a cruise or planning a cruise.

Geraldine shared many gifts with her family and the following are some that her children now share and cherish:

• Have a purpose, be busy, don’t waste a moment.  Mum taught us that life is full of amazing experiences that can lead to many more.  And people are interesting, talk to them, hear their stories. 
• However, the busy-ness of the day officially ends when you sit down and enjoy a fresh brandy & dry (or two, but never more), usually around 5.30 pm.  In more recent years, she chose to ‘liberate a bottle of wine’ instead.
• Manifest your hopes and desires and they will come true.  School friends, in particular, will remember mum got around in a uniform of tennis skirt and bobby socks, she always dressed ready for a game of tennis just in case someone needed a sub.  Sure enough, she played most days she wasn’t working. 
• If you’ve got nothing nice to say… I never heard mum talk about others negatively, or gossip, she was never judgemental.  She was a good person, trustworthy, reliable, curious and interested.
• A sense of humour is important and mum had a great one.  Very sharp, a little wicked.  I’m sure this came in handy as a working mum in Australia in the 1960s. 
• Mum was a feminist.  Dad was too.  We were brought up to be independent and to understand equality and respect for all.  I never, for a moment, thought I didn’t have choices in my life.
• Mum was great, calm under pressure.  A story that demonstrates this so well was in 1968, Mum, Dad and a two month old Matthew lived in the Blue Mountains.  One of the worst bushfires in history tore through the region.  Dad stayed back with neighbours to fight the fires, mum stayed as long as she could, then drove down the mountain with Mat.  A nervous drive filled with twists and turns made worse with smoke haze and flying embers.  When mum got to the check point she was turned back.  She’d missed the curfew, she was the very last person on the roads… but she calmly negotiated her way through to safety. 
• Mum was a progressive women, ahead of her time.  However, we need to mention her love of 1980s pub rock but 20 years later.  Growing up, mum loved classical music, opera, pop opera (Gilbert & Sullivan) and a bit of the Seekers, Simon & Garfunkel etc.  But around the end of the century, she got into Cold Chisel, ACDC, Queen. 
• Then there’s the gift of Napkin Art!  Anyone who has experienced a dinner with mum will recall this talent.  She taught us the art of sculptural napkin folding – it’s a thing.
• And finally, Stay active, stay fit to stay healthy.  Before lockdowns, mum was still enjoying plenty of tennis, snow time, cruises, book clubs, bridge, the MTC and more.  She was a force.

Geraldine believed she was lucky, but we believe she created her own luck.  It was her own doing, she got herself into the right place at the right time. 

And as we know, Geraldine liked a plan, did things her way… right to the end.

Published: 26 April 2024